Trying

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I keep trying so hard.
Trying to be good.
Trying to be wise,
to be skillful,
to be knowledgeable,
capable,
cheerful,
likeable,
worthy of love and respect.
Hustling for my self-worth
is an endless battle.
If I could just put down my weapons,
walk away from the front lines,
go to a quiet place,
get still
and breathe,
I might become attuned
to the inherent goodness,
the worthiness that is my birthright.
But how after years of training for war
do I give up the fight?

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2 responses »

  1. There’s an awful lot of ‘trying’ in there. It seems to me you write your own answers; maybe the balance is just out of whack at the moment. Maybe that quiet time to breathe and be still, to remember your own words about being a “human being”, not a “human doing” (or even a “human trying”) is, as you say, exactly what might help? Much love to you.xx

    • Thank you again, dear Theresa, for showing up with such kindness and care. I appreciate your words and the feeling behind them. And yes, breathing and being still, remembering that I am human after all–this is exactly what helps in a situation of too much trying. Thanks again for being so caring and encouraging–you are lovely. ❤ 🙂

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