The Reason for Meditation

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Sitting in meditation this evening
I sensed the importance of this practice,
the reason for doing it in the first place.
We spend so much time fulfilling certain roles
and chasing after this or that object, person, experience–
we can so easily forget who we really are.
Meditation is a way to come home,
to simply regain awareness of our own being,
to remember who we are beyond the roles we play
and the things we think we need to have or do or say.
To have a felt sense of presence,
to drop from mental fixation
into physical sensation
and from this bodily awareness
into the silent awareness at the center of being–
this is the practice and each minute matters.
It occurred to me that I could die peacefully
if I practiced enough of this letting go in meditation,
because what is death but the same letting go,
stretched over a much longer duration?
To let go of everything outside of myself
and to experience peace with this emptiness,
to find the joyful I AM at the core of  pure being,
to know this feeling of wholeness within the stillness–
no longer any fears about what I will leave behind
because I merge with the whole universe
and see that there is nothing that is not me.
I dissolve into space over and over again,
I become intimately familiar with this release,
and the final letting go is another homecoming
rather than a surprise.
As I accept the inevitability of my own death
now I am free to fully live.
And this is the reason I meditate.

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