Tag Archives: feelings

The Truth of My Deepest Self

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And then I realized
this suffering isn’t
some nuisance to be tolerated…
it’s an opportunity
to dive deep within myself
and learn something.
It’s a chance to trust
that what I’ve been given
is what I’m meant to have
(for now)
and as I shift inside
I’ll see the shifts on the outside too.
It’s a confrontation
with the old, outworn stories,
a chance to rewrite the narrative
into something deeper,
something more beautiful,
more meaningful than before.
And I turn to my higher power,
saying,
Let this be an initiation
into profound understanding.
Let this be a signpost
that I’ve moved into a territory
of authentic feeling.
Facing what arises,
loving what I cannot yet understand,
faithful that whatever brought me here
won’t leave me here to die…
Awakening to what is
and who I am,
seeing the truth of my deepest Self.

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Ocean of Life

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I search for meaning
because I want all of this
to mean something…
but what if this was all
impersonal?
What if I could step back,
take a deep breath, relax,
and not see any of this
as a threat?
Peace would come quickly then.
All of the stories of heartbreak,
loss, suffering, injustice
emerge from a sense of self
separate from the world around it.
If I could merge my consciousness
with that of the world’s,
wouldn’t I laugh
at the absurdity of it all?
I could cry all day and night
for twenty years,
and it wouldn’t change
the rhythm of the ocean.
Can I let these waves passing through me
be just another indication
that I am one with the ocean of life?

Real Relationship

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I find my anger is getting out of hand,
hot, explosive, uncontrollable, painful.
I stop and look inside.
Under the anger is grief.
Under the grief is fear,
the belief that something is wrong with me.
Behind the fear
there is a soft, tender spot,
a vulnerability,
the truth of my innocence.
If I can stay in touch with this innocence in me,
then I can see and honor the innocence in others.
And then real relationship is possible.

Back Home to Joy

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Don’t hide your pain,
especially from yourself.
Pain hidden from yourself
gets blamed on others.
Be brave, warrior,
and look deep inside.
The pain is just another facet
of the deep and abiding joy
that is who you really are.
To experience this deep joy,
you must navigate through
your own pain.
Sit still, breathe,
pay attention to your body—
it has much to tell you.
Breathe a little more,
let it reach deeper into you.
Tune into all of it,
feel all of it,
the grief, the anger, the sadness,
the resentment, the disappointment—
whatever it is, it is showing you the way
back home to your joy.

The Message Becomes Clear

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The sadness consumes me
and it feels so familiar to be caught like this,
to be caught by anger, by resentment,
by anxiety, by fear, by doubt…
It occurs to me that it doesn’t take
much courage to feel what I’m feeling,
but it does take courage to recognize
what the feelings are here to teach me.
What can I learn from the sadness,
from these shadow emotions
whose presence bring balance
to the more desirable states of
joy, calm, love, confidence?
There is a deeper courage called for here:
to trust that if they’ve shown up,
they have something, some message to convey,
and to be patient and wait
while the message becomes clear.

The One to Blame

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In a difficult situation
I keep searching
for the one who is to blame.
I grapple with anger, grief,
resentment, and every little
shame, malice, and enmity
until I’ve worked myself
into a prison of self-pity.
I look around.
There is no door,
no lock, no key.
There is only a mirror.
I take a deep breath,
open my eyes wider,
look hard at the reflection
and discover the one
who caused all this is ME.

Rollercoaster

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The rollercoaster of emotions…
One moment
fury, rage,
the next,
sadness, grief
I try to find ground
and discover that nothing is solid.
The world trembles and opens up
beneath my feet.
I fall and keep falling.
Even my dreams speak
of disaster, of dissolution, of death.
And what am I grieving?
It certainly wasn’t love
if it dissipates into a thin veil
and then disappears
as if it were never there.
Am I mourning what I’ve lost
or my projection
of what could have been?